Insight-Oriented Therapy for adults. What is it? And how does it help?

Adults come to therapy for all sorts of reasons. It could be a mental health diagnosis, such as anxiety or depression. It could be to treat an addiction. It could be to work through difficulties in parenting, or a romantic relationship. It could be to address an internal state of unhappiness.

At the core of all the ways in which an adult might describe their reason for seeking therapy is usually some type of “why” that they have been asking themselves.

Why am I always anxious?
Why am I unhappy?
Why can’t I control my anger?
Why am I so lonely?
Why don’t my children listen to me?
Why am I sad?
Why can’t my relationships last?
Why can’t I fall asleep?
Why is my mind always racing?
Why do I feel like a failure?
Why can’t I say no?
Why do I feel so guilty all the time?
Why is parenting so hard?
Why can’t I stop drinking?
Why can’t I relax?
Why can’t I stop thinking?
Why am I always distracted?
Why do I make the same mistakes over and over?
Why can’t I get along with my parents?
Why am I depressed?

Exploring these “whys” is, in a nutshell, the goal of insight-oriented therapy. So much of how we feel, and act, and think is automatic and “just happens.” Usually, we don’t pay much attention to the automatic parts of our lives when things are going well. But, what if the way you are thinking, or acting, or feeling is not serving you? What if it is unhealthy? What if you are stuck in an unhealthy pattern? When this happens, a powerful way to resolve the issues you are struggling with, and have lasting change, is to gain insight into why they are happening to you in the first place.

Individuals who come to therapy often explain that they have tried to improve their circumstances. They might have tried strategies or tried to change their behaviour. They might have made efforts to change their thinking. They might have taken medications. They might have even tried therapy in the past. However, the strategies they tried either weren’t effective, or the gains they made just did not last. This can be deeply frustrating. It doesn’t mean they didn’t try hard enough. It could mean that they didn’t try to right things for their unique circumstances. Making the right change you for involves having insight and understanding into why you are struggling in the first place.

Insight-oriented therapy builds on many things that we know about human development – that the past shapes the present; that our early history (attachment patterns) sets the foundation for our emotional well-being; and that insight or understanding the “why” of our circumstances is at the heart of lasting change.

Individuals are often unaware of how their past may be connected to their current life and the struggles they are experiencing. Understanding the ties between your past and present can help situations feel much less overwhelming and much more manageable. This is especially true in matters of emotions and relationships.

Individuals who seek therapy are usually curious about themselves and want to be self-reflective. However, intense emotions can be a barrier to independent self-reflection. Sometimes it can feel too uncomfortable, or even painful, to “look inside” ourselves. One of the first jobs of the therapist is to facilitate an emotionally safe and secure therapeutic connection. Within this therapeutic relationship, self-reflection can occur without judgement and from a place of motivation to understand yourself and to bring about change in your life.

Insight-oriented therapy is a process of self-understanding that evolves over time. Insight gives you the opportunity to think in situations where you might have previously just reacted. Insight allows you to shift your perspective in healthier ways and make choices that are in your best interest. Insight facilitates change; change brings relief; and relief creates more opportunities for insight.

Life is complicated. Relationships and emotions can be overwhelming. Parenting can be harder than expected. There can be loss, grief, and trauma. There can be failure, shame, guilt, and fears. Life can be hard.

Life can also be deeply rewarding and deeply meaningful. Relationships can be fulfilling and healthy, and emotions can be manageable. Insight and self-understanding create a powerful compass for navigating towards a rewarding, meaningful, and fulfilling life.